Strengths-Based Coaching: Creating Real Impact for Clients

January 26th, 2012 by Gary Jordan

Why did you get into coaching? One of the most likely reasons is that you wanted to have a real, positive and lasting impact on the lives of your clients.

Unfortunately, many of the approaches that coaches currently use in their work don’t have this kind of lasting effect, for the simple reason that they focus on what clients currently don’t do well, as opposed to what they do.

It sounds counterintuitive, doesn’t it? After all, the client has come to you, the coach, because they have an issue in their life (or a host of issues) they want to change. Change, by definition, calls for something new. Surely there can’t be any harm in helping clients figure out new skills that can help them change their circumstances.

Well, yes and no.

A coaching approach based on the usual method of trying to strengthen these acquired skills – i.e., things that don’t come naturally to them – may have an impact on a client’s life, but it is likely to be short lived and superficial. (It’s also, quite honestly, the kind of stuff you find in self-help books and magazines that want to help you, essentially “become someone else.”)

Clients come to us as coaches most often because they don’t know what to do to change and often cannot articulate why what they are trying to do isn’t working. Over the past 30 years of coaching, my business partner and I have found that real results come when we help our clients discover what it is they already do well, and put it to greater use in their lives. We call this strengths-based coaching.

Using their natural gifts consciously in their lives not only tends to help a client blow through whatever blocks they might be facing, it’s more fun for the client. After all, who doesn’t enjoy doing what they do well? It’s a winning combination that inevitably leads to a real, lasting impact.

Of course, a total focus on a client’s strengths isn’t always an option – sometimes, in order to overcome a block, a client really does need to acquire new skills. But even so, we do our best to focus on those new skills in a way that honors who the client is by taking advantage of their natural capacities. When letting go of roles that require acquired capacities is not an option – such as job, for example, that doesn’t really satisfy the client, but which they can’t quit for the time being – then coaching should explore how the client can keep the end objectives (to keep the job) but modify the means used to achieve it so that they use their natural skills and abilities as much as possible.

In the end, it’s all about making room for your client’s brilliance, and how that person can put it to work in overcoming their challenges. Ultimately, the client needs to accomplish his or her personal objectives and goals by using their own natural strengths.

Gary Jordan, Ph.D., has over 27 years of experience in clinical psychology, behavioral assessment, individual development, and coaching. He earned his doctorate in Clinical Psychology from the California School of Professional Psychology – Berkeley.  He is co-creator of Perceptual Style Theory, a revolutionary psychological assessment system that teaches people how to unleash their deepest potentials for success. He’s a partner at Vega Behavioral Consulting, Ltd., a consulting firm that specializes in helping people discover their true skills and talents.  For free information on how to succeed as an entrepreneur or coach, create a thriving business and build your bottom line doing more of what you love, visit www.ACIforCoaches.com and www.ACIforEntrepreneurs.com.

Do You Stand Above the Competition, or Fade into the Background?

January 17th, 2012 by Lynda-Ross Vega

Today’s article is by guest blogger Lisa Marie Platske. She’s a good friend and wonderful colleague – and her Leadership Success Summit event is not to be missed. I’m very excited to be one of the speakers this year. I hope you will join Lisa Marie and me at the Leadership Success Summit – a great environment for making valuable connections and a true learning experience without the sales hype. See you there! Lynda-Ross

lisampink

Do You Stand Above the Competition, or Fade into the Background?

Born with the gift of hospitality, I fell in love with the art of leadership in my teens. Leadership is influence — nothing more and nothing less.

As a small business owner, leadership can be the difference between a waiting list for your services, and happy, successful clients, or just eeking by.

Ask yourself, where are you headed? Who is following you? Are you going someplace worth following?

Sometimes it’s just a little tweak, sometimes it’s a major overhaul of where you are but change is part of being a small business owner.

Unfortunately, many people aren’t sure where to start. Failure to have these 7 areas in place will cost you up to 21 hours a week, and tens of thousands of dollars a month – real testimonials from my clients.

To stand out, here are the 7 Leadership Steps to get you on your way….

• CREATE A WRITTEN PLAN: Know what you want and why you want it. Then, write it down! (Not sure where to start, email me for my list of 7 Power Questions…)

• KNOW THY PERSONALITY: Be aware of your strengths and understand how your personality affects what you want and the process of getting it. Identify the 5 traits that are your strengths and what make you uniquely you AND identify the 5 traits that get in the way of your success. If you aren’t sure, ask someone close to you what they would change about you if they could. You may be surprised. Then, choose one action that you will work on to move you towards being the best version of you.

• CREATE POWERFUL PARTNERSHIPS: Invest in what you do best and network the rest. Create powerful partnerships through shared interactions. Create a board of advisors.

• PRACTICE PRESENCE: Understand how your physical image affects getting what you want. Hire someone to help you look great, even if you think you already do. Be present to life’s miracles, lest you miss out on living your life to the fullest. Have an attitude of gratitude and be grateful for the challenges as well as the opportunities. And, choose to be kind over choosing to be right. Employ the 15-second rule.

• SET YOUR PRIORITIES: Identify where you are spending the best hours of your day and ensure that you are in alignment with your values.

• CHART YOUR PROGRESS: Evaluate! Evaluate! Evaluate! Examine your P&L statements, and spend time identifying what is working and what is getting in the way.

• INVEST IN PERSONAL/PROFESSIONAL DEVELOPMENT: Life-long learning is critical to your success. Leaders are readers, and learners are earners. What will you do to further develop who you are to get you closer to your definition of success?

In a changing world, what are you investing in or doing differently ensure that you get the results you want in business and in life?

May you experience incredible success as you choose to lead yourself personally and professionally in a manner that inspires others to do the same.

About the Author:

Lisa Marie Platske, President of Upside Thinking, Inc, (www.UpsideThinking.com) is an award-winning entrepreneur and dynamic inspirational speaker/trainer, known for her contagious high energy. In addition to conducting seminars throughout the U.S., she works one-on-one with coaching clients on her “Gateway to Greatness: Million-Dollar Make-over” 7-step leadership process. Client results include tripling their income, and up to 3 “extra” hours in their day. She is the author of Designing Your Destiny: Achieving Personal and Professional Success which has been hailed as “life-changing” by clients and colleagues alike. Her most recent book, Connection: The New Currency was released in August 2011. Lisa Marie is also the founder of the Leadership Success Summit (www.LeadershipSuccessSummit.com)

*** So, if you want more, please join me for two-days of action-packed tips, tools, and strategies on January 27 – 28th, 2012 in Ontario, California at the 4th annual Leadership Success Summit. To register, visit www.LeadershipSuccessSummit.com.

Coaching and Psychological Styles: Adjust Your Approach!

January 13th, 2012 by Lynda-Ross Vega

“Adjust your approach.” As a coach, you’re probably familiar with this concept, as different clients need different tools – and different types of communication – to achieve the results they’re looking for. But most often, these adjustments are based purely on intuition; sometimes they make a difference in the client relationship, and sometimes they don’t.

Just as problematic is the fact that coaches often don’t adjust their approach until the first approach has clearly failed to produce results, eroding client confidence and straining the coach/client relationship, sometimes to the breaking point. In this case, such adjustments are a classic case of “too little, too late.”

The Perceptual Style Theory offers a reliable means of avoiding this by giving you, the coach, a clear picture of who the client is before you begin working together. By making use of an assessment that reveals the client’s psychological type at the outset of the coaching relationship, it’s possible to make those important adjustments right away.

The power of this is hard to overstate, as it gives the client an immediate sense of being deeply understood. As the coaching relationship progresses, it also gives the coach a clear picture of what kind of language will speak to the client, and what kind of language won’t.

When you honor and connect with a client’s Perceptual Style (PS), you interact with them in a way that reflects their actual experience of the world. Based on your knowledge of your client’s PS and your understanding of your own PS, you can adjust your approach to ensure that your client gets the most out of the coaching experience.

To clarify, when we talk about adjusting your approach, we’re talking about fine tuning the words you use, as well as the manner in which you interact with them, including intensity, speed, emotional variability, and energy level. Each PS has its own comfort zone, sources of motivation and inspiration, and immediate turn-offs. Knowledge of all of these things can be crucial in catalyzing the kind of results the client is looking for.

Knowledge of the client’s PS can help you to interact in ways that will promote clear communication and avoid stylistic conflict. It is, in effect, meeting your client halfway –
so that even though you do not see the world the way they do, you have the tools to acknowledge and respect their worldview as valid.

By learning to adjust your approach to accommodate each of the six innate Perceptual Styles, you’ll see your effectiveness as a coach grow exponentially. It is, after all, simply human nature to respond to those who speak our language, and interact in the ways we’re most comfortable, even when we’re seeking significant change in our lives, be it professionally or personally.

Lynda-Ross Vega: A partner at Vega Behavioral Consulting, Ltd., Lynda-Ross specializes in helping entrepreneurs and coaches build dynamite teams and systems that WORK. She is co-creator of Perceptual Style Theory, a revolutionary psychological assessment system that teaches people how to unleash their deepest potentials for success. For free information on how to succeed as an entrepreneur or coach, create a thriving business and build your bottom line doing more of what you love, visit www.ACIforCoaches.com and www.ACIforEntrepreneurs.com.

Psychological Style Theories: What They Are, and Why They Matter

January 6th, 2012 by Gary Jordan

We all know that different people see the world differently. Sometimes we find those differences appealing. At other times, the differences between ourselves and others are an irritating source of conflict. But rarely, in either case, do we take the time to understand just what it is that accounts for the fundamental diversity of human perspectives.

Psychological style theories were designed to help us make sense of this diversity by grouping people by commonalities according to their habits, behaviors, and priorities. This, in turn, can help us to increase our appreciation for the differences between ourselves and others and decrease the amount of conflict we experience as a result of these differences.

Most style theories are based on the four temperaments that were introduced by Hippocrates, modified by Plato, and further developed by Galen – all before 190 AD. These four temperaments have been given many names along the way:
– Hippocrates (370 BCE) called them Blood, Black Bile, Yellow Bile and Phelm (all such appealing labels from the father of medicine)
– Plato (340 BCE) called them Artistic, Sensible, Intuitive, and Reasoning (labels for the thinking man)
– Aristotle (325 BCE) called them Iconic, Pistic, Noetic, and Dianoetic (very philosophic)
– Galen (190 AD) called them Sanguine, Melancholic, Choleric, and Phlegmatic (another medical perspective)
– Paracelsus (1550 AD) called them Salamanders, Gnomes, Nymph, and Sylphs (pioneer of chemicals and minerals in medicine…need we say more?)
– Kretschmer (1920) called them Manic, Depressive, Oversensitive, and Insensitive (psychology creeps in)
– Keirsey (1978) Artisan, Guardian, Idealist, Rational (the modern revision)

Many of the most popular assessments in use today describe a person’s psychological style as a mixture of attributes from each of the four basic types. Others use bi-polar continuums (e.g. feeling v. thinking, dominance v. compliance, rationalist v idealist, etc.) and describe style as the combination of an individual’s placement on each of these continuums. The use of combinations and continuums allows types to gently slide from one to the next, which allows people to believe that their psychological style is based on their situation, leaving them without an explanation to why they experience irreconcilable differences with others.

After all, if our psychological style can change from day to day, why do we keep encountering the same types of problems with the same types of people?

Our research with the Perceptual Style Theory (PST) supports a different understanding – that each person’s psychological style is innate and unchanging. This style describes who a person is in a fundamental way, rather than in a surface way that changes from one circumstance to the next. The six Perceptual Styles do not exist on a continuum in which one gradually slides into the next, but reflect six distinctly different perceptually based psychological experiences of the world, each supporting an incredible range of natural capacities, skills and abilities.

PST, by stating that each Perceptual Style represents a unique perceptual experience, provides an individual with an opportunity to understand the differences between people without judgment. Those differences are real, meaning they truly reflect differences in how the world is perceived, and acknowledging them tends to lead people to an increased understanding and appreciation of different points of view. This also helps avoid the need to view people’s differences as due to stupidity or stubbornness, or as just plain wrong.

Gary Jordan, Ph.D., has over 27 years of experience in clinical psychology, behavioral assessment, individual development, and coaching. He earned his doctorate in Clinical Psychology from the California School of Professional Psychology – Berkeley. He is co-creator of Perceptual Style Theory, a revolutionary psychological assessment system that teaches people how to unleash their deepest potentials for success. He’s a partner at Vega Behavioral Consulting, Ltd., a consulting firm that specializes in helping people discover their true skills and talents. For free information on how to succeed as an entrepreneur or coach, create a thriving business and build your bottom line doing more of what you love, visit www.ACIforCoaches.com and www.ACIforEntrepreneurs.com.

Teamwork and Psychology: Insights from 30+ Years of Business Coaching

December 30th, 2011 by Gary Jordan

What does it take for 800 people to work together on a project with a minimum of friction? Back in 1983, that’s exactly what my partner Lynda-Ross and I were aiming to figure out.

When I fist met Lynda-Ross, she was managing a very large multi-year systems development project for a major corporation and she was searching for tools to help the people working on the project stay motivated, reduce conflict, and perform to the best of their capability.

Through my years of college and graduate school, I had been fascinated by theories about psychological styles—such as those posited by Carl Jung—but none of the theories I studied fit my personal experience. Beginning with my doctoral dissertation and continuing through 18 years in private practice, I had worked to create a practical, useable psychological styles theory that integrated internal experience with observable behavior.

Lynda-Ross brought me in as a consultant to the project to help the management staff learn tools and techniques to improve teamwork and optimize the talents of the existing staff, and the more we observed and worked with people, the more we discovered.

One of the things we learned was that not only do people who perceive the world similarly get along better, they had many of the same skills and abilities. As we thought about it, it made sense to us that people who perceived things similarly would possess similar skills. It was the next logical step to realize that the skill and ability similarities we observed were based on a similar style of perception, and that each of the six Perceptual Styles had an innate set of natural capacities.

Together we developed processes and training that used the Perceptual Styles Theory to help build teams, diffuse unnecessary conflict, and help people to understand that seeing things differently is not wrong, just different.

More than thirty years later, the same things we observed on that first project have held true, and they remain the basis of our work as coaches. Why? Because what it took for that huge team to succeed is what it takes for any team to succeed.

1.
It takes people with different Perceptual Styles filling different positions on the team. After all, skills and abilities are directly tied to the ways that we perceive the world as individuals. The person who excels at accounting is generally not the same type of person who thrives in customer service.

2.
It takes all of those people learning how to communicate effectively with one another, despite the differences in their Perceptual Styles. Simple adjustments in language and message delivery can eliminate 90 percent of all communication conflicts.

3.
It takes all of those people feeling motivated, even though the differences in their Perceptual Styles means that different things will motivate different people. A range of incentives are required for optimum momentum on a project.

4.
It takes leadership based on the team leader’s actual skills and abilities. There are many different ways to lead. The only right way for any given person is the one that fits their innate Perceptual Style.

At every level of development, psychological styles are a huge factor in the success or failure of a business—because no matter what it is or what it does, people are what make your business tick.

Gary Jordan, Ph.D., has over 27 years of experience in clinical psychology, behavioral assessment, individual development, and coaching. He earned his doctorate in Clinical Psychology from the California School of Professional Psychology – Berkeley. He is co-creator of Perceptual Style Theory, a revolutionary psychological assessment system that teaches people how to unleash their deepest potentials for success. He’s a partner at Vega Behavioral Consulting, Ltd., a consulting firm that specializes in helping people discover their true skills and talents. For free information on how to succeed as an entrepreneur or coach, create a thriving business and build your bottom line doing more of what you love, visit www.ACIforCoaches.com and www.ACIforEntrepreneurs.com.

Life, Business and the Pursuit of Happiness: Do More of What You Do Best!

December 22nd, 2011 by Lynda-Ross Vega

Why do some people thrive in the work they do while others seem miserable?

Throughout my years as a business coach and a consultant, this question always fascinated me. On a practical level, I always tried to place people in the “right” job for them. But uncovering “right” was a trial and error process of soliciting input from people about what they wanted and then observing their performances.

It wasn’t until my partner Gary and I developed the Perceptual Style Assessment that I discovered a reliable way to help people match their talents with the tasks at hand. Together, we discovered a natural correlation between a given person’s innate abilities and talents—as revealed by their Perceptual Style, and a number of associated factors—and where that person naturally excelled in work and business.

Over the past 30+ years of working together—coaching businesses and teams ranging from Fortune 500 companies to startup entrepreneurs—Gary and I discovered an organic connection not only between happiness and these innate abilities, but between unhappiness and the failure to put these abilities to work.

There are two major reasons people experience a disconnect between their natural abilities and their day-to-day actions: first, by focusing on developing what they don’t do well, and second, failing to develop what they do.

We all have a lot of forces in our lives that encourage us to try harder at what we don’t do well. You know the saying: If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again. It’s all well and good to demonstrate persistence and stick-to-it-iveness, but too often, we spend our time trying to get better at what doesn’t come naturally to us, rather than developing what it is we actually do well.

For the most part this arises from good intentions on the part of people and institutions that want the best for us – our friends and family and our schools and employers: they want to help us to become well-rounded human beings. The paradox is that in getting us to pour our energy into improving skills that don’t come naturally, we often push our true talents into the background. This creates a lot of frustration and unhappiness for most people.

Which leads to our second major factor: when people get so focused trying to acquire new skills, they end up undervaluing those things for which they are naturally gifted. People fail to appreciate what they are able to do easily and assume it isn’t anything special. Nothing is farther from the truth. But all too often, the attitude towards gifts and talents seems to be “If I can do this really easily, it must not be worth anything.” It seems to be part of human condition to believe that if it isn’t “hard work”, there isn’t value.

Based on these two factors, it’s not hard to see why so many people wind up stuck in jobs they don’t enjoy, or wearing hats in their businesses that really don’t fit who they are.

The simple fact is, people are happiest and most satisfied in life when they are engaged in actions and activities that draw upon their natural capacities, skills, and abilities.

Our experience over the years has shown us that people who consciously develop their natural capacities experience more joy, satisfaction, and success in life. Our motto is “Do more of what you do best”. It is at the core of our philosophy of strengths-based coaching – building on what each individual naturally excels at.

Lynda-Ross Vega: A partner at Vega Behavioral Consulting, Ltd., Lynda-Ross specializes in helping entrepreneurs and coaches build dynamite teams and systems that WORK. She is co-creator of Perceptual Style Theory, a revolutionary psychological assessment system that teaches people how to unleash their deepest potentials for success. For free information on how to succeed as an entrepreneur or coach, create a thriving business and build your bottom line doing more of what you love, visit www.ACIforCoaches.com and www.ACIforEntrepreneurs.com.

Family Holiday Gatherings: Why Do We Have Them?

December 12th, 2011 by Gary Jordan

Most of you, I am sure, know the scene: As December marches on we prepare ourselves to gather with family members to celebrate the holidays. You may prepare for it with dread, with joyful anticipation, or with a mixture of the two, but we do it every year and rarely ask the question, “Why”?

I was confronted with this question recently by my 21 year old nephew, and I have become quite intrigued by my quest to find an answer.

My nephew was raised in Norway but returned to the US when my sister became terminally ill and died when he was 16. Estranged from his Norwegian father, my family has considered him to be “ours” since that time. He is a very bright and pleasant to have around, and while he is quite engaging one on one, put him in a large social gathering and he turns inward and becomes socially shy and awkward.

We were talking about the upcoming family gathering on Christmas day, and I was doing my best to give him some pointers that I hoped would make the day less uncomfortable for him. Even though he has joined the extended family for Christmas the last three years, outside of me and my family, he rarely sees the other people who will attend the celebration. After I had named off the 18 people who will be there, described the connections and relationships between them all, and made some suggestions regarding how to manage the event for himself and who he might most easily talk to, he turned to me and dropped this bomb: “Well, if it takes so much work, everyone has to ‘gear up’ for the day, and everyone is happier when it’s over, why do people do it every year?”

After stunning me into silence, then sending me into internal reflection to find my answer, I became more and more intrigued by the question. It is true that while I look forward to the family gathering on Christmas day, I also have to prepare myself mentally for the event. Who do I want to avoid a prolonged conversation with? Who is likely to create conflict with its resultant pouting and hurt feelings? Who do I want to make sure I have some time with? Do I need to watch out for anybody’s emotional ambush? Are there immediate family members I need to protect? It is a lot of work and although generally enjoyable, it rarely lives up to the hopes, expectations, and promises that all the symbols of the season arouse deep within me. I have learned over the years that I am far from alone in this holiday ‘disappointment’.

I was so intrigued by my nephew’s question that I discussed it with my wife and my business partner. After some deep reflection and discussion we came up with our answers, but not before we all agreed that it is not the carefree joyful day the PR department would have us believe.

I am not a cynic. I found great value in the process of asking the question of myself and others. I know why, outside of the religious meaning of the day, that I look forward to all the effort and, yes, hassle that the annual holiday gathering is. But rather than handing you my discovery, I want to give you the same challenge to look inside and find your own meaning. I promise that I will give you my answer, but first, I would love it if you would share yours here with us. I don’t care if it is deeply religious or stunningly secular, fabulously frivolous or emotionally powerful. I am just interested in what meaning others find in an event about which we seldom think but in which we all participate annually.

Gary Jordan, Ph.D., has over 27 years of experience in clinical psychology, behavioral assessment, individual development, and coaching. He earned his doctorate in Clinical Psychology from the California School of Professional Psychology – Berkeley. He is co-creator of Perceptual Style Theory, a revolutionary psychological assessment system that teaches people how to unleash their deepest potentials for success. He’s a partner at Vega Behavioral Consulting, Ltd., a consulting firm that specializes in helping people discover their true skills and talents. For free information on how to succeed as an entrepreneur or coach, create a thriving business and build your bottom line doing more of what you love, visit www.ACIforCoaches.com and www.ACIforEntrepreneurs.com.

Take Off the Blinders! Coaching Based on Perceptual Style

December 9th, 2011 by Lynda-Ross Vega

Coaches have the honor and privilege of working with a broad range of clients in a variety of different contexts. Whether the context for that coaching is professional or personal, clients reveal what life is like from their unique perspective. What might come easily for one client is a constant struggle for another. What feels like an opportunity to one client feels hugely intimidating to another… and the list of differences goes on and on.

Some clients have developed a self-consciousness of their inner lives. In the course of situations that challenge their intuitions, judgments, views, and realities, they ask themselves, “Why do I respond in this way? Would someone else respond the same way? What is it that makes me different?”

Most, however, have never asked themselves those types of questions, and remain relatively unaware of the differences between their perspectives and that of those around them.

Whether or not your client has developed this kind of self-reflective consciousness, as a coach, you need to be aware of his/her individual and unique perspectives in order to be effective in your coaching.

Why?

Because understanding your client’s innate Perceptual Style is a critical component of:

  • Communicating effectively
  • Creating real motivation for change
  • Creating a development plan your client will find energizing and exciting (rather than overwhelming or dull)
  • Overcoming seemingly “unmovable” obstacles to personal or professional fulfillment
  • Helping clients to understand themselves (and, in the long run, become their own best coach)

Once you understand your client’s innate Perceptual Style, you can help to pinpoint their strengths and natural abilities as well as their weaknesses and persistent set-backs.

For example, the Vision style client will be inspired by a big-picture goal, and will jump into the challenge of getting there with both feet. This type of client has no problem working with incomplete information, or  in switching tactics when one approach doesn’t work out.

The client with the Adjustments style, on the other hand, will need more information in order to proceed, and will feel more comfortable working with a clear plan. This Style, too, is willing to change approaches, but only after more information has become available, and usually in a more incremental way.

The good news is that each of the six innate Perceptual Styles comes with a vast array of talents, skills and abilities. Helping clients tap into those natural assets – rather than pushing them to develop ‘acquired skills,’ that don’t come easily – will help them power through obstacles and overcome challenges in a way that feels completely natural.

The key to getting a handle on your clients’ innate Perceptual Style is using the right assessment – one specifically developed to help you, the coach. Rather than relying on a one-size-fits all coaching model – or on your basic intuition — the right assessment will unlock the world as it appears to your clients, as opposed to how the world appears to the person who developed your coaching system, or to you.

After all, no matter how great a coach you may be – or how natural the coaching process may be for you – you have your own innate Perceptual Style, too. The right assessment can help you see beyond your own biases and offer the most value to your clients.

Lynda-Ross Vega: A partner at Vega Behavioral Consulting, Ltd., Lynda-Ross specializes in helping entrepreneurs and coaches build dynamite teams and systems that WORK. She is co-creator of Perceptual Style Theory, a revolutionary psychological assessment system that teaches people how to unleash their deepest potentials for success. For free information on how to succeed as an entrepreneur or coach, create a thriving business and build your bottom line doing more of what you love, visit www.ACIforCoaches.com and www.ACIforEntrepreneurs.com.

The Entrepreneur’s Journey: Finding Your Place in the World

November 30th, 2011 by Gary Jordan

It sounds easy – knowing who you are. It should be a given, right? Knowing and understanding who you are is a lifetime process that begins in childhood, on the playground, when you begin the process of learning just where you fit in.  But where you fit in as an entrepreneur is a whole different question!

Most people start a business because they have an area of expertise. If they’re in tune with who they really are and what makes them happy, chances are, this area of expertise is also an area of deep personal passion. Unfortunately, many entrepreneurs take the time for self-discovery once they start their business – and wonder why they’re not happy actually running their business, day in and day out..

After all, the focus of the business is something they love, and the products and services reflect that passion. Shouldn’t that be enough?

Well, actually, no – for one simple reason. Starting a business means that you’ll wind up wearing all kinds of different ‘hats’, playing a multitude of different roles, from accountant to marketing director, personnel director to chief financial officer.

The entrepreneurs who are actually happy in their businesses, day in and day out, are those who have gone one step further in their own process of self-discovery and determined the types of roles they actually enjoy filling, and the sorts of tasks they’re naturally suited for. They’ve found a way to focus in on those roles, developing what they do best – and delegating the rest. All of this benefits their businesses.

First, by freeing them up to do their ‘genius’ work’ – the work they truly do better than anyone else. Second, by filling the other roles with people who are actually happy and fulfilled in those capacities that bog down the entrepreneur and sap his drive. To be happy in business, it is vital for people to do what they naturally prefer to do and find engaging, because they will be more productive, happier, and, as a rule, procrastinate far less.

The business owner who understands how important it is to build his business around his natural strengths and abilities in this way also discovers exactly where he fits within the context of his business. These entrepreneurs also stop trying to do everything themselves, exponentially increasing their effectiveness with the help of a dynamic, powerful team.

Unfortunately, many entrepreneurs fail to reach this point. They look around at the business they’ve built, based on a real passion in their life, and wonder, why am I not happy with this? What’s missing? And (worst of all!), what’s wrong with me?

If you’ve ever felt this way, take heart: there’s nothing wrong with you. But it’s high time you honored yourself enough as an entrepreneur to discover your natural strengths and put them to work for you in your business.

Gary Jordan, Ph.D., has over 27 years of experience in clinical psychology, behavioral assessment, individual development, and coaching. He earned his doctorate in Clinical Psychology from the California School of Professional Psychology – Berkeley.  He is co-creator of Perceptual Style Theory, a revolutionary psychological assessment system that teaches people how to unleash their deepest potentials for success. He’s a partner at Vega Behavioral Consulting, Ltd., a consulting firm that specializes in helping people discover their true skills and talents.  For free information on how to succeed as an entrepreneur or coach, create a thriving business and build your bottom line doing more of what you love, visit www.ACIforCoaches.com and www.ACIforEntrepreneurs.com.

Business and Relationships: Change Your Words, Change Your World

November 22nd, 2011 by Lynda-Ross Vega

I have several friends who send me interesting emails. You know the type, You Tube videos, jokes, stories – you probably get a few of these, too. Recently, I received one that got me to thinking about its message, which was “Change your words. Change your world.” It’s a message that really hit home for me, especially within the context of human Perceptual Styles.

How you perceive the world – how you make meaning out of what your senses experience – really does determine your world. This means that the words you choose to create meaning and share your experiences with others have a powerful impact on your life.

We’ve all experienced the positive effect of a few well-chosen words – the smile you get in return for a simple “Thank You”… the glow that accompanies a compliment.

But we’ve all also experienced a complete disconnect with one or more people over words that seem out of context, harsh, or “unnecessary.” The fascinating thing to me is that the value and impact of a word changes based on our view of the world, not just on our understanding of the word itself.

For example, I know what the words ‘always’ and ‘never’ actually mean – in fact, I doubt there’s much argument out there over the meanings of these two words. But I rarely use either of them and neither do most other people with the Vision Perceptual Style.

Why? Because to us, those words feel limiting, and people of the Vision style experience the world as a series of endless possibilities. In fact, Vision folks tend to find comments like “you never….” or “you always……” insulting or challenging when applied to them. That’s because they know that they don’t “never” or “always” anything – they respond to life as it unfolds before them, improvising as necessary to take advantage of opportunities.

But for people with the Methods Perceptual Style, “always” and “never” are simple statements of fact based on what is known from an individual’s past behavior – no future application is considered or implied. So from a Methods perspective, Vision people really overreact to a simple fact!

There are a million other examples of differences between Perceptual Styles when it comes to the ways we use language. Those differences have a profound impact on many aspects of our daily lives – such as what marketing appeals to us and what kind turns us away, and which leaders motivate us and which leave us shaking our heads- not to mention our relationships. As a coach with 30+ years of experience, let me assure you that a key source of conflict in our personal and work relationships is the disconnections that result from the words we use (in guidelines or memos, for example, or at home, during conflicts and arguments) and what they mean to all parties involved.

So the next time you get a reaction from someone over something you’ve said that surprises you, stop to ask what it might mean to them before you react. You’ll be amazed at the differences you’ll uncover and the conflicts you’ll avoid! When you change your words you really can you change your world.

Lynda-Ross Vega: A partner at Vega Behavioral Consulting, Ltd., Lynda-Ross specializes in helping entrepreneurs and coaches build dynamite teams and systems that WORK. She is co-creator of Perceptual Style Theory, a revolutionary psychological assessment system that teaches people how to unleash their deepest potentials for success. For free information on how to succeed as an entrepreneur or coach, create a thriving business and build your bottom line doing more of what you love, visit www.ACIforCoaches.com and www.ACIforEntrepreneurs.com.


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